Saturday, July 17, 2010

And now I start writing...

I see this as the second phase of my school career:  I will begin to write my dissertation.

Yesterday I was in my office, one of my classmates--we came into the program the same year--came to chat.  One observation: Can you believe that we've been here 3 years already?   I cannot.  The first year here in University was probably my worst year ever (which brings to mind the last time I said that about a year, my 7th grade year, which at the end, I thought that I wouldn't wish my 7th grade year on my worst enemy....heh, funny how one keeps tracks of years).   I was assured that it would would all pass quickly by my officemate at the time, a girl about to graduate.   Well, they say that the years pass quickly, and it's the hours and the days that last forever.  It was the beginning of my path towards depression.  

The second year was alright.  In fact, I can't really think of anything good or bad to say about it.  One of my friends got married, in the local courthouse, and they had a simple reception at their house afterwards, with food from their favorite Indian restaurant.  They had a magnum of some sort of sparking wine chilling on their porch, an Asti, I think--as I gift, I had brought a bottle of Veuve-Clicquot.  Towards the end of the dinner, they toasted with my stuff.  I wonder now, thinking of it again, if it was rude of me to bring it.  Towards the end of that year, I began to accept that I would be here for the long term, as in really, really accept it.  My depression bottomed out around that time.

And summer before my third year began.  It was a very quiet summer, mostly.  There were trips to Pittsburgh and Philadelphia.  I had family visit me in University Town for the first time.  I watched the movie Julie and Julia.  I can't remember if I watched it with my husband in person, or if we watched it him at his theater, and me at mine.  I want to say that we watched it together.  In the movie, the protagonist, Julie, takes up blogging.  My husband suggested that I do the same, to give me something to do in University Town.   And so, this blog started.

I think that this blog did keep me sane this year.  School wasn't bad this year.  In the fall, I had two classes that I very much enjoyed.  The first classes the entire time I've been here that I can say that I actually enjoyed.  The spring was hard.  Tough classes, but it kept my mind engaged, and they were both classes that I wanted to take.  Then of course, there was the summer class that I taught!  It was an adventure every day.  I laughed, I cried, and now, it's done, I feel like king of the hill.  And in the winter, when I normally go crazy...I cooked, I photographed, and I blogged.  

So here I am.  Last week I returned from a trip to Niagara Falls.  And now, I'm working on writing my dissertation.

I was on the phone with my husband today.  We joked that in old cartoons and TV shows, the wife would wail "I'm going to go my mother's!"   I pointed out that I would just get on the plane and go back to University Town.  It used to hurt me that I lived here by myself.  It doesn't hurt so much any more.

The penny remains.